The Featured and The Forgotten

Why is it that when people start dating someone they forget all about their friends?

Remember how on Christmas morning you found the toy you hoped for under the tree and you didn’t put it down for days, forgetting about all the other toys in your room? Having a new boyfriend is kind of the same way- he might have not been delivered by Santa, but it’s new, shiny and just what your friend hoped to receive. Give your friend a little time to bask in the glow of dating someone new and you’ll hear from them before you know it. After all, your friend is going to need to tell you all about the new love!

It’s been a while since I’ve been in a relationship and now I’m in one… and it’s a lot of work! I feel such a tug between my work life and my personal life, not to mention friends and family. I feel like I’m going to break because I really want both.

And both you shall have… it just takes focus and proper time management skills. When it’s time to work, you work and when work is over you leave it at the office and focus on your personal life. I know that’s a basic concept and that it may be easier said than done, but it’s really where you should start. When you’re in single mode it’s easy to blur the lines of work and personal life because the latter didn’t include a partner. Now that you have the motivation to see clearly, you’ll find the balance between work and personal lives.

I’m single again after a ten-year relationship and all my couple friends have stopped including me in activities and calls from them have pretty much ended. Why am I not friend-worthy as a single?

Don’t let the actions of others determine your worth as a friend… you know better and you’re saying that because you’re disappointed. Their reasons for the non-inclusion really are insignificant as it doesn’t change the result of their choices; their actions made you feel badly. Dynamics change, friends change, your relationship status changed… and now it’s time for you to make a change. Find some new friends, preferably ones that don’t make you question your worth. Now’s the time for a shake-up- you’ll feel great once you do!