My fiancée and I are planning our wedding and although we’re having a lot of fun with it there’s a cloud over the event. His parents don’t accept that he’s gay, certainly don’t accept me and don’t support same-sex marriage. We’re 90% sure they won’t attend, and I know it kills my other half. What can I do?
Congratulations on the upcoming wedding! It sounds like you’re doing everything you can do, which is creating an event that’s perfect for the two of you. The day is about your future as a legally committed couple surrounded by well-wishers who support that journey. It would be great it his parents attend but if they don’t it doesn’t diminish the fact that you two found each other, built something amazing together and are taking it to next level greatness. All you can do is make certain your fiancée feels your love and the love surrounding him on your wedding day and every day after.
My husband and I have been married for two years. His mom refused to attend the wedding because at the time she couldn’t accept the gay thing. Over time, she has (to her credit) worked through her feelings and now has become an active and supportive player in our lives. My husband still harbors some resentment in spite of her change… how do I get him to snap out of that?
Sometimes it takes some people longer to show up at the rodeo, but what truly matters is that they finally got there. Although his mom missed out on some major milestones and events in your lives, it seems that she’s done with missing and on board for participation. It’s hard to overlook something major like not attending a wedding and he’ll surly never forget, but perhaps he should remember that as disappointed as he is, his mom’s level of regret is probably greater. The key is to move forward, create new memories and be thankful that everyone is harmoniously together.
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